


Destroying Me

by BBJ_3



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: First story, M/M, Obsession, Pining, Possessive Behavior, Twisted, down the rabbit hole so to speak, possibilities
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-15
Updated: 2016-10-15
Packaged: 2018-08-22 15:27:04
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,186
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8290880
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BBJ_3/pseuds/BBJ_3
Summary: Few have the choice of being born, and even fewer are so alone yet so surrounded when thrust into the world as Edward Hyde. Is it so shocking, really, that he turns his yearnings for worthy companionship onto the one person who constantly surrounds him but is never there?





	

When I first woke to this world, I knew more than any newborn had known. Surrounded in _his_ trappings, I was a man made of another’s flesh in a way no mother would bear her child. My skin was not my own. The books – the glassware – the clothing, the silver, the furniture – none of it was mine. Though _he_ had made some preparations for my arrival, the items were still not mine.

 

So I purchased clothes I preferred. Organized rooms to my taste knowing they would likely be gone by my next waking. Some vanished. Some I was permitted to keep. Each item which remained in my possession was a gift. Hollow of any virtue the moment he framed its existence in acceptance.

 

When those who surrounded _him_ came into view of me, the temptation to commit the same cruelty was too tempting. Would _he_ love her if she had turned some affection upon me? Her kisses were sweet. An edge that faded the longer she was near me. I could only find true comfort in them the first time after I returned. A truth made all the more poisonous as similar conditions plagued me in all else.

 

She was, however, the first to whisper in my ear comments about _him._ I had heard passing praises of his genius. Credible as I stood as proof though none knew. Others had commented on his reclusive habits and anxious tendencies. A man or two had sneered questioning her interest in _him_. Her words painted the delicate details of Henry Jekyll into relief. The distance between us shrank. I craved each knew facet of him.

 

At a dinner where _he_ had been invited – but where I had given his reluctant refusal in letter, I met her father. An insipid waste of air filled with unwarranted vanity. His usefulness only lay in revealing new aspects of my puzzle. As he insulted Henry Jekyll, I could only conclude his existence held no further purpose. I had fought before to defend my honor, but never had sentiment driven me to act in the interest of another. Frankly, more often I would work specifically to ensure Jekyll’s annoyance though I could never confirm such.

 

The same night – I hired my first man to spy on Jekyll. Each new speck of intelligence carved the cavernous well of want deeper. Rather than seeking to hide my actions from him or flaunt them in his face, I reformed myself. Where once I enveloped myself in luxuries, I turned my attention to him. His simple trappings were an insult. He deserved better.

 

If his humility kept him from them, I had no such qualms. He had given birth to me. Cradled me in his very flesh as my mind formed from his own and grew to what I had become. Any child would repay their mother. Good food, warm blankets, soft pillows, rich clothes…if my spies saw him wanting for anything, I saw to it that his needs were met.

 

Though I did not question my instincts in the matter, I had considered his reactions to be strange. Jekyll grew all the more anxious for my new behavior. He ran. My spies were useless, but no matter how far he went, he could not escape me. Whether I consented or not, Jekyll had made me his Warden. A cruel fate when all I desired was to see him content.

 

His plan and my own were all too similar. We could not remain as we were. The last pieces fell into place when those storybook characters appeared. Jekyll might have spent eternity hiding from me in shadows if he was the only one to suffer – dangerously self-destructive. With the room all to ourselves and that needle in my hand, my heart had never drummed so loudly in my chest.

 

Tore apart piece by piece – as if I birthed him as he had once done to me – the serum cleaved us in two. His eyes met mine. Soft. His gaze as gentle as any I had seen though already lined with tears. A matching wound beneath his eye, but his litheness alone did not catch my attention. Every nuance once described found its place on his person save his lips. His brows knotted, and I _yearned_. I had been born and surrounded in what was not mine, but here fell their master, my maker, _mine_.

 

“So nice to finally meet you…Doctor.” The words tumbled from my lips. My own brows furrowed mirroring what I had never been given the chance to emulate.

 

Slowly, he acknowledged me, “Hyde.”

 

I stepped forward reaching out my hand. His physical presence presented an overwhelming number of possibilities. “I’ve heard so much about you,” I said offering my hand. He took it, and I wanted nothing more than to keep touching him, but as I easily lifted him, my heart sank. When had he last eaten? Why was he so thin? Was my eating insufficient for the two of us? “You’re even more disappointing in person. You’re so weak…” I murmured patting him down. My main occupation had been his comforts, yet he was less than ever due to his ridiculous obstinacy. “So pathetic.” Realizing the cruelty he’d make of my bluntness, I sought for a more complimentary truth. “I was actually impressed that you had the courage to try to finish that serum of yours in secret.”

 

Though I sought his gaze, he avoided mine. “I had no choice. Being with you is destroying me.”

 

Destroying him? I had given him everything. Every piece of equipment and clothes – his favorite foods – everything I had done had been for him, and I would ensure he realized how thoughtless he was being after I had endeavored to soften my honesty.

 

“But do you see the irony?” I asked. My rage would not be held. Regardless, it was better he learned to adjust to my temperament sooner than later. “Being separate is…” I cradled his face in my hands, and resignation released the tension from his brow. Was being with me so regrettable that death held favor? “..what’s going to destroy you…”

 

He showed strength then as he resisted all survival instincts and permitted me my rage. Perhaps he realized I could not bear to cause him permanent harm. His friends had no such qualms. Electricity and fear – gone…I awoke and all that was mine was gone.

 

They had no idea how to care for him.  Even those I had specifically commanded inevitably harmed him or allowed him to harm himself. Those foolish creatures would encourage his obsessions and permit him to work to unreasonable exhaustion. Poole had failed miserably to even minimally succeed in ensuring Jekyll slept consistently, ate well, and maintained a reasonable schedule. Torn away from me, he would only grow worse. If I had to make a deal with the Devil himself to tether Henry Jekyll to me, well…that particular Devil would find me. Jekyll may have been doctor, but I took no chances in caring for what was mine.

 

And make no mistake – Henry Jekyll was mine.  


End file.
